It never gets easier, you just get faster....

Thank you Greg Lamond for that amazing quote. And thank you to coach Mike for reminding me of it post race. Because I have never actually felt those words truer than when I raced Ironman 70.3 Madison this last weekend.

I have been racing for going on 6 years. And every single year I am a better athlete than the year before in one way or another. Some year its speed. Other years its mental toughness. Other years it's just learning how to race and maintain my sanity. 2019 is another year of monumental gains for me in several areas of my racing. I am part of an incredible team of people on the Elite Wattie Ink team for starters. And knowing that group for the last year has given me more inspiration than I have had in the last 6 years combined.

However, this is not a race report. If you are looking for one, here is a summary: It was hilly. The run was super hard. I thought I was going to die at the end. (Pretty sure thats how I have summed up every race I've ever done in my career.)

But this race was so special for a lot of reasons. It was seriously the whos who of Midwest triathletes. Like if there was a pageant for the best looking, fastest people who are all super duper nice, this was it. I guess you could say the talent was pretty monumental out on the course!

I also had a ton of friends there racing, including several of my Wattie Ink family from both Elite and the Hit Squad!! Every time I turned around I had someone I knew cheering and supporting me! So thank you to everyone who was there. It was so so so amazing.

But ultimately what ended up happening at this race was that I became stronger, more level headed, and even more determined to perfect my racing. I hit the watts that I wanted to on the bike, pushing myself to numbers that I had never seen myself due in any race thus far! So going into the run I had a feeling that coming off of a tough bike, there was a definitely possibility of an explosion at some point. And don't worry, it definitely happened at mile 6 or so. But it didn't ruin my day! I pushed forward. I climbed the hills. I drank all the Coke. And I got to that finish line like I had intended to do. (Word to the wise, the finish line at this course is 3 annoying switchbacks up a hill. So if you are absolutely blacked out and spent like I was, buckle up.)



I have never crossed a finish line with absolutely nothing left in the tank like I did. I had to sit down and just get my bearings before I could even fathom trying to get up and figure out where I was at. And, man, was that a good feeling. I gave that race everything I had. And I saw some really great personal growth as an athlete on top of that. So, yeah, I only finished top 13 in my age group. And yeah, I didn't get a spot on the podium. But I had a great day, surrounded by the people I love, and I smiled more times than I can count on that course. I can 100 percent say I walked away knowing I gave it my best.


I am going to take this race as a chance to know that I am capable of hard things. And I am going to take that training into Ironman Lake Placid in 6 weeks. Because all I can ask of myself this year, and every year after this, is how bad do I want it? And the answer will always remain the same: More than everyone else.

Grab life by the horns

When it comes to strength training, I will be the first to admit that it has always taken a backseat to the other disciplines in my triathlon career.

But I found a new routine that has absolutely changed how I think of strength training as a triathlete. Let’s talk about Kettlebells. If you haven’t experienced a workout with these bad boys yet, then let me tell you why I’m obsessed with them. 

I suppose I should mention the most exciting part, and primary reason why I was so compelled to write again this week, was that I finally get to channel my passion for both triathlon and fitness into a career now. I have recently joined lifetime fitness as a group fitness instructor, and I will be teaching their ultra badass Kettlebell Kombine format.

Since I’ve started incorporating kettlebells into my strength routine, I have most certainly seen gains in my overall fitness. The movements that are done in Kettlebell Kombine are dynamic and challenging, and I am utilizing so many more muscle groups than I would with just simply strength training in the weight room.

There were several studies done that provided some incredible results for participants of Kettlebell specific workouts. 

Below I’ve listed the key points that were really most persuasive to me.

-In a study conducted by UW-La Crosse, participants saw increase in aerobic capacity, dynamic balance and dramatic core strength changes.

-Abdominal core strength was boosted by a whopping 70 percent in participants 

-Kettlebell workouts are a cross between circuit weight training and running training.

-They provide an explosive, total body workout

-Kettlebells offer a powerful workout, in a short amount of time.

-A study found that subjects who performed a steady 20 minute set of kettlebell snatches and lifts burned the equivalent calories of a 6 minute mile.

While strength training tends to fall by the way side during the core race season, I plan on incorporating kettlebells as much as possible as I train for both Ironman Canada and Arizona this year.

And if you are in Chanhassen on Monday’s, make sure to come in and spend 45 minutes with me in the studio with our new friend, the kettlebell.

All the Kona feels

2019 is going to be epic. That is my new mantra.

And after watching the Ironman World Championships yesterday, I can honestly say I have never been more excited going into a race season.

I mean, I’m not super excited that I already woke up to snow this morning. But I guess the upcoming hours of trainer rides will ultimately build some awesome mental tenacity right? Or they will make me crazy. Stay tuned to find out.

But seriously, watching Danielle Ryf cruise through the Queen K, or getting to witness Lucy Charles’s epic swim gave me the fire that I needed to get my head back into training.

This year I took two months off of structured training. Which was the first time I had done that in 4 years. And I guess I am still trying to decide if I liked the lack of supervision, or not.

What I do know is that this year was one of the hardest seasons I’ve had. After completing my first Ironman Distance race in 2017, and going back to the Olympic Distance for 2018,  I can honestly say I never really felt like I was myself this year. Which maybe is why I felt a little lost, and a lot burnt out by the end of the year. And maybe my torn Achilles didn’t help either.

It did solidify one thing though. The fact that I miss the long course. Like a lot. And signing up for both Madison 70.3 and Ironman Whistler was just what the doctor ordered for my little mini slump I was having.

And after watching all the badass ladies out on the World Championship course, I want nothing more than to be better, and faster, and stronger this year. 

So time to dig deep, get the trainer out, and get ready to grind out the yards in the pool. It’s Ironman season.

Multi sport season begins. And almost ends the same day.

When I woke up last Saturday morning, I was the normal mix of both excitement and nerves. I had been counting the days down to the first race of my season, and on the morning of May 26th it was finally upon me. 

I had dialed the taper week in, and did everything I normally do leading up to a race. 

But with my focus being short course and speed this year, I was finding that my body was reacting in ways I hadn’t felt before. When I did my pre race run Friday, I felt a pain in my ankle that I hadn’t noticed before. I shook it off as a pre race phantom injury and nothing more. 

When I got to the race site Saturday morning, I felt great. I got warmed up and meandered up to the start line. I had some really awesome ladies toeing the line with me, so I was beyond stoked to get out there and race.

The countdown started, and as the group shuffled forward, I was out of the gate like a bat out of hell. I was determined to win overall AG today and my run was where I was going to achieve that. 

As I made my way up the first hill out of transition, I was sitting pretty with a significant space between myself and the rest of the ladies. I had no idea what my pace was at, since Mike was challenging me to race without a Garmin this day. That was a whole different feeling in itself, but I must say I eventually enjoyed it! I was listening to my body and pushing it to its actual limits, not following pre conceived notions of what it could do. 

But at the last aid station, I grabbed a cup of water to douse myself with since the temps were already at about 90 degrees. And in that moment I stepped, and felt the most unfortunate “ping”. I hobbled the last half mile to T1 to get to my bike, determined to hold my lead.

Stupidly, I thought I could ride the 20 miles and stretch it out a bit and would be 100 percent by the time I got to T2. But the first climb where I had to get up and put weight on my ankle was telling me otherwise. 

I am not good at quitting. And I am even worse at giving myself a break when I’m injured. 

But this day was different. When I got back into T2, after only getting passed by a handful of women, I was still hell bent on getting out there, passing them, and taking that podium spot. 

But as I put my shoes on, and took about 10 steps, I immediately knew that would not be happening. So I then stopped. Turned around. Took my race belt off. And sat down. Because I knew my day was done. If I kept running and pushed myself like I knew I would, the risk for an even more serious injury was inevitable.

I know I made the right call. But as all triathletes know, we are our own worst enemies. I felt everything from disappointment, to shame, to fear, and then finally panic.

What does this mean for my season? Will I be able to race Liberty to qualify to race elites at Lifetime? Am I out all year? Will I be able to race nationals this year??

Luckily for me, my support system is rock solid. My boyfriend consoled me, and gave me the support I needed to not break down that day. And after calling my brother/coach, he made me hopeful that this wasn’t a season ender. And since he had a similar injury a few years back, I was confident that he would steer me in the right direction.

I recently met with an incredible Doctor out of Minneapolis, Dr. Ross Koch, and let me tell you, this guy knows his stuff. We did everything from cupping to acupuncture to grafting in the hour I met with him. I will know after my 2nd visit with him Monday what my future holds, but I’m hopeful that the racing gods are pushing for me to get back out there! Because this rest and recovery thing is not in my wheelhouse. 

So no matter what he says Monday, I am going to keep my focus on Nationals in August. Because that is where I am going to leave my mark. And if I need to recover first to get there, you better believe that’s what I’m going to do. 

Fingers crossed that I’ll see you all at Liberty!

Staring out over the ledge

And just like that, it's race season again.

I thought I had all the time in the world to get race ready. But, just like every year, the first race of the season has crept up and surprised me again. This Saturday I will be racing at Apple Duathlon along with some of the best talent in the state. And I am not sure if I can confidently say that I am ready.

While last year was my Ironman year, this season is a complete 180 from what I was training to do last year.

My workouts have been short. They have been aggressive. And they have pushed me to the edge more times than I can count. But the edge this year has been so different for me. While last year it was about tackling distances I have never fathomed, this year it has been about hitting speeds and times that I didn't think I was capable of.

Another key difference is that this year I have decided to take the pressure off of myself. While my race season goals this year are monumental, my focus is to keep my head clear of the unnecessary pressure that I always seem to place on each race.

The first step towards that was traveling around and enjoying my life. And not stressing about missed workouts, or nutritional slip ups. I will admit it, I am a complete control freak. Which makes me both a great and terrible triathlete. My meticulous attention to detail keeps me on track during race season, but those neurotic tendencies tend to drive me to the edge of sanity more often than not.

As a last hoorah before race season, I traveled to Europe with my amazing boyfriend for my 33rd birthday. We flew into Amsterdam, where we sampled Stroopwaffles and wandered the red light district. Then we rented a car and drove through Belgium as we made our way to our final destination of Paris. We enjoyed a Labor Day street festival in Antwerp as we passed through, but also made sure to try some of the famous Belgian chocolate I had always heard of. And this whole time I did not go for a run. Or do laps in the pool, or even hopped on a bike. And that was ok! I was having the time of my life in a beautiful country with an incredible partner in crime.



We arrived in Paris and I got to enjoy ALL the croissants, and ALL the crepes and ALL the pastries that a girl could dream of!! And once again, the calories and the lack of working out were not even close to my mind. I did try to run one day in Paris, but it was so congested and the streets were so narrow, it felt much more like a brisk walk than a run. I took that as a sign that the Universe was saying I should throw in the towel. Which I had no complaints about!

But here I am, back at home, staring out on the horizon of the beginning of my season, and I don't feel nearly as ready as I did this time last year. Ive raced a couple of running races, and actually had a PR in the Get In Gear 10k this year. So maybe my "wing it" mentality may be the key to a great season this year.  Plus I am the happiest and healthiest Ive ever been, so that is a win in my book either way.

Aaron and I conquer our fear of heights by trying to climb the Eiffel Tower. Spoiler alert: We didn't make it to the top!

Quintessential tourist photo of the Eiffel Tower

Whatever happens tomorrow I know that I will give it my all and push myself to be the best athlete I can be. I still have my goals in my sights, and I still plan on breaking in to the Elite category this year and crushing the competition at Nationals in August.

Let's just hope those Parisian croissants were the carbo loading that I needed to get me to the top tomorrow.

Notre Dame!!

Is It Race Season Yet???

Here we are. Mid January. The time of year that every triathlete dreads. (Or maybe its just me. But I have a feeling I am not alone in this thought.)

It's freezing cold out. The days feel like they are 5 hours long. And getting into a pool at 5 am feels like what I would imagine walking the Green Mile to certain death feels like. However instead of lethal injection, it's sets of 100s, 200s, and enough kick sets to make your hips pop out of their sockets. Plus running outside is like a really sick game of "don't slip on ice and break your face" every time you step out the door. So that is challenging in it's own right.

However I probably shouldn't complain. After Ironman I took an epic trip to Costa Rica as a reward for all my hard work. And let me tell you, some days I really think I could have stayed there forever. It also turns out that surfing is great cross training for triathlon! Even if you spend 70 percent of the time wiping out!
I found that the vacation was a much needed mental break after the intense stress of 2017, and it set me up to tackle 2018 with a clear mind and open heart. Plus, I learned how to open a coconut with a machete, so that's pretty cool too.

My favorite winter running partners, The Nicoles!!

As I came back to the frozen tundra, I adjusted back to reality. Where as we near the end of winter, it becomes that weird time in an athlete's season where training is just starting to ramp up, but there is still a small lull before the real work happens. As I am sure my coach can attest, it's also the time of year where I become ultra neurotic and manifest all sorts of annoying quirks I never thought I had before. I think my Training Peak logs for workouts this time of year are the most detailed, and probably the most angry as well. I have all this energy and all this drive, but it's base building time. And I am going bonkers.

And for me, this year's training couldn't be any more different than what it was a year ago. I was told by my brother/coach that I am actually going to have some free time in between training and real life this year, which is so foreign to me. Say whaaaaaa???? I don't even know what to do with that. Like, what do people with free time even do? Other than eat. Because I also have to remember that I am not eating like an Ironman this year. Unfortunately.

Santa Theresa, Costa Rica. 

Swoon. 

My first day there I went on an 8 mile beach run. This was my view. And it did not suck.

So back to what this year looks like for me. After training and completing my very first Ironman race last season, I have decided to shift gears for 2018 and go back to Olympic distance races. But not just any Olympic distance races. I have my sights set on USAT Nationals in the majestic city of Cleveland, Ohio in August. I plan on racing both Olympic as well as Sprint distance that weekend. Because let's be honest, why the hell not?

And as much as I loved training for an Ironman, I am looking forward to a year of short, intense training, and fast and furious racing. Being at threshold for two and a half hours at a time sounds like a brand new, albeit super gross challenge. Don't get me wrong, eventually I will be back doing another Ironman, hopefully in the next year or so.

And that brings me to my big, sweeping declarations for my 2018 season.

I have a theory that if I verbalize the goals that I want to achieve, and actually admit that they are real, then I am going to have a better chance of having them come to fruition. That's basically what I did for Ironman Madison. I visualized the finish line every single day for 365 days. Every workout I did, I pictured myself crossing that timing mat, and ultimately that is exactly what happened. So who is to say that I can't prescribe to that very same theory for short course training as well, right?

So here it is. Strangers of the internet, here is my super scary, holy shit, I am now a big ball of vulnerability, goal for this race season:
I am going to get faster than I have ever been. I am going to qualify to race Elite at the Lifetime Olympic Distance race in July. And then I am going to race at Nationals in August and qualify to go to worlds for 2019.

I'll be back to #rockthew with my Wattie crew this season again. 

Our kits are fire. Literally. Sickest ones I've seen yet. 

Yikes. Seeing that on paper made my stomach do flips and my palms start to sweat a bit. So, historically, these feelings are leading me to believe that my goals are juuuuuust big enough. And I know that I will achieve greatness this year in one way or another. I just have to keep my positive mental resolve throughout every single race. And oh boy do I plan on racing a lot. That's the best part about this distance, is that I can go out and do what I love, and literally race all the time to practice and hone my skills.

So I will survive the January slump. I will get my nutrition back on track. (Apparently Cinnamon Toast Crunch and Fig Newtons are not helping me get back to race weight as fast as I had hoped.)
Then I will attack every bike ride with tenacity, and I will pedal until my legs can no longer move. After that I will run, and get out of my comfort zone, and push to find that limit. Then I will suck it up, take a deep breath, and break through that bullshit barrier that doesn't exist. Because that is what people who succeed do. They stop believing that failure is a bad thing. They embrace the fear and unknown. And I have found that learning to fail is what is going to make me succeed in the end.

Every season I keep a constant mantra in the back of my mind as a motivator. Last year it was "You can do hard things."

 However, this years mantra is brought to you by the very smart and very talented coaches of Final K Coaching Services. "Be better." That's it. No excuses, no what ifs. Just be better than I was the day before.

And then I am going to conquer the world. One mile at a time.

The Post Ironman Struggle Is Real, BTW.

How do you put into words the best feeling you've ever had in your life?

It's been 4 weeks since Ironman Madison, and I am still struggling to find the words that can accurately describe those 13 hours of my life. Sure, I could go through my whole race report and tell you how nervous I was, or how my pacing turned out, or even what happened with my nutrition plan, but those were just pebbles in the gravel on a giant mountain of a day. Don't worry, I will still go over that, but I think Ironman recaps are so much more than a data recap. They are a chance to analyze and interpret all the ups and downs and emotions that a race can bring.

Let's go back to 5 years ago. When I was a pack a day smoker. When I worked in a nightclub and spent my days sleeping until 4, only to wake up, get ready, and go get a beer and shot of Jameson before my shift at 10 pm that night. It was a vicious cycle, but it was all I knew. After spending 12 years in the service industry, drinking and sleeping were the two things that were just part of the deal. But about 4 years ago I made the shift into a healthier lifestyle, which included quitting smoking and eventually becoming sober.

And now my life is full of early morning swimming, long bike rides on the weekends and running at every chance I can get. I have also surrounded myself with a crew of people who have similar goals and aspirations, and I must say, life is great. I feel more mentally strong than I ever have before, and the physical transformation was a happy byproduct of this change. Which brings me to where I am today.

This time last year I decided I wanted to do something that most people would never dream of doing. I wanted to complete 140.6 miles in under 17 hours. Call me crazy, but that sounds like one hell of a dream.

Now, because I think I am somewhat of a glutton for punishment, I decided to compete at Ironman Madison. A notoriously tough course. But, as Jimmy Dugan would say, "The hard is what makes it great."
Woof. And what a fricking course it was.

The swim in Lake Monona was long, mostly because it really was. The 3rd buoy led me to believe I was making progress, but lo and behold, I was merely starting into the longest stretch of a swim I have ever had in my life. However, with the wave starts I was pleased to find that it didn't feel like as much of a washing machine as everyone had described. While I still got a few good elbow jabs to the head and one or two kicks to the chest from my fellow athletes, I actually felt pretty serene in the water.

Once I was out, I got my wetsuit stripped by a very nice gentleman, then I was off to sprint the helix and get to the transition. I am being one hundred percent honest when I say running up that helix was the coolest thing on the planet. I even turned to one lady and said "It feels like we are in the Olympics!" She didn't like my joke, but I thought it was funny and really accurate.

As I got onto my bike I had settled in and started to prepare mentally for the day ahead of me. As a not so strong cyclist, I knew this leg would make or break me. But when you start the ride by passing a house with free puppies in front of it on mile 10, you just know its going to be a good day. It took all my willpower to not get off and go play with them.

So the bike went as expected. Hills, great spectators, more hills, lots of farms, some cows, another hill or two, etc. However as I approached mile 40 I had to make one of the bigger decisions of that day. To walk Barlow or not. I had ridden it twice in training, but I felt like I had the energy of race day to get me up that beast. Plus when I got there and saw my coach in a foam cowboy hat and gold jumpsuit at the top, I knew I had to rally. And rally I did. Getting up Barlow, and the high that followed kept me going until about mile 75. And then things got dark. I was getting nauseous. My legs were getting tired. And I no longer wanted to be on my bike anymore. I literally at one point had to force feed myself a Lara bar and choke it down with some water. I knew that if I became underfed and dehydrated, this would be the beginning of the end. And as I hit Midtown for the second time, I saw Jeff and Kendra, the two best cheerleaders I could have ever hoped for. And they got me up that hill and over that mental slump I was in. It was a lifesaver, and I don't think they even realize how crucial they were to me finishing that bike ride.

The amazing thing about Ironman is that in the middle of things, when you feel your worst, you somehow pull out things that you never thought you would be capable of. As I rode into transition, I had a second wind that was pushing me onto the run course. It didn't matter that 20 minutes ago I thought I was going to throw my bike in the corn field, or that I thought I was going to puke up all my uncrustables and Huma packets I had consumed, or that I had no idea how I was going to tackle a full marathon. I was onto the next part of my day and I was ready to crush it.

I was off the bike and into my happy place. Only this was not like my normal happy place. I was immediately in the mind set of telling myself to "just move forward". There was no warm up. No build. I was thrust into my marathon and had to keep telling myself over and over this was my fucking day, how bad do I really want it? Luckily I saw my coach, Mike, right as I got out of T2 and he yelled "This is yours. GO GET IT!" And I knew I could do it.

Every mile hurt. Every single damn step was a challenge. Now don't get me wrong, some portions of the run I felt great and like I could run a million miles. But then there were many moments where I couldn't fathom how I was going to get through 26.2 miles. But I had the support of everyone I love. And each high five and cheer was enough to push my ass forward. Plus, State street was one of the most exhilarating crowd spectacles I had ever seen. You will never feel like as much of a rockstar as I did that day running by all those bars. I don't care if those cheers and support were fueled by Miller Lite and fireball, I was absolutely floored by that kind of love.

And special shout out to Coca Cola. That shit is liquid gold. Every aid station I took a swig and it was like when Popeye eats the Spinach and all of a sudden grows biceps. While I had told myself initially I was going to wait until mile 10 to drink Coke, I knew immediately that wasn't going to happen.

And as the sun began to set, and I made my way back towards State Street that day, a huge sense of sadness actually hit me. It was all over. Those 13 hours went faster than any minute I have experience prior. While some of those minutes may have felt like years, the day as a whole went by in a blink of an eye. It was the best day of my life, and I wish I could go through it again times a million.

The most poignant moment of my day came at the end. I rounded the last corner by the capital and could see the finisher chute. But before I got to it, Mike ran up next to me and said the words that finally made me cry my first tears of that day. He looked at me not only as a proud coach, but I could see that he was even more proud of me as my big brother. And he said the words that I will never forget for the rest of my life. "You did it. Everyone is waiting for you." And the flood gates opened, and I ugly cried harder than I have in a while. I was an Ironman. I had become someone who I never thought I would be. And I was someone who was worthy.

I had finally found who I was meant to be and how to be truly happy. And it only took me 140.6 miles to get there.